Morning After Dreaming
|Blue. Definitely blue. No... green. Yeah, that's it. And what was her
name again? God, it was something short. Short but not harsh. It had some
sort of succint beauty to it. God what was her name? The name in itself
had some level of flair, and-- Claire! That's it, her name was Claire. And
where were they? Was it some sort of club, or a restaurant? Maybe it was--
"What the fuck Lones, are you still in bed? You were awake when I got up, and I just showered. What the hell have you been doing?"
"Trying to remember a dream. It's a bad investment in my time, since the more I try to remember the more vague the details become. But then again the investment in time doesn't matter since I'm unemployed. My time is worthless."
"Well it wouldn't be if you stopped sulking about losing your column and got a new job."
"I still can't wrap my head around getting fired. I mean, that column was well thought out."
"Well it didn't sit well with a lot of people and they complained to the editor. The paper bends to the will of the masses, not the little guy. You got fucked, but guess what? You can still walk and talk. So stop acting like you've been stricken dumb and lame and go get yourself another job."
"Oh Dan you're so inspiring. Now that you've lectured me, I have the proper incentive to jump straight out of bed and go be charismatic in a job interview."
"You're pathetic. The desire to be someone should be incentive enough. You just lay around like someone will break into our apartment and offer you a job. We live in the real world. No handouts here."
Lones fumbled with the bedsheets. The sheets seemed completely against him. He'd pull them up and they'd leap away from his feet. He'd push them back down and they'd wrinkle awkwardly. He would try to curl up to maximize coverage and end up with a lump of fabric in his side.
"Fuck it." Lones muttered as he tossed the sheets off the bed.
"So what was your latest dream about anyway?"
"I have no idea. I know it involved me being a hopeless romantic and getting away with it."
"Nice." Dan said as he straigthened his tie and brushed off his jacket.
"You know what I like about dreams?"
"What's that?" Dan asked as he turned away from the mirror.
"They're always in the middle. There's never a beginning to a dream. When you're aware of a dream you're already part of the ongoing events, and then when you wake up it's always abrupt. That's how life should be. I can picture myself working, but not having to go through a bunch of shit just to have the fucking privilege to work. I'd like that option in life. To be able to just skip all the setup."
"But that would take all the fun out of the end result. Nothing is quite as good when you don't have to go through a lot first."
"Quite as good? Bleh. I'd settle for mediocre."
"Well then rejoice, you're already there. I have to go to my job. You remember those. Jobs. They bring in money for rent. Which, by the way, you owe me about 3 months of."
"But you're a club bouncer. Isn't this like... a really early shift?"
"Lones, the club is an hour away. It's five in the afternoon."
"Oh my God. That means I slept for... what? 14 hours?"
"Sounds about right. Well, I really have to go. You can contemplate your sloth while I'm away, or better yet, you can look through the classifieds and figure out what you're going to do with your life. It's not over yet you know." Dan put on his hat and was out the door before Lones could come up with a sufficient response.
Was he really this lazy? How could he be unemployed? He'd always been so smart. And clever. People told him so, damnit. When he met people they always remarked on how witty and intelligent he was. Straight A student growing up. There it was. That's the problem. Intelligence. Just another means to an end. And it didn't entitle him to shit. Kind of like book smarts. They're useless unless you can apply them. How else could memorization of trivia, whether it be from a television show or a history book, be of any use?
"A teacher!" Lones exclaimed. "I could be a teacher! I can simply shove off all those facts and tidbits of knowledge onto the smart children of the next generation, and then they can deal with their shit later. I'm a genius!"
Lones dashed over to the table and thumbed through the classifieds. No mention of teacher positions.
"Damn there are a lot of electricians needed." Lones muttered as he flipped through the pages.
Finding nothing, Lones stumbled back to the bedroom and flopped himself down onto the mattress.
"Well, I could also actively search. Go to schools, see if they need positions filled, subjects taught, lessons delegated. See if they hire people who talk themselves too, that's always a plus. Or I can get to it later. Yeah. I mean, I'd have to find out where the schools were first. And then set up appointments. And... ugh. Or I could call up Erin and see if she wanted to go out later. That could bring happiness to my dull dreary life. Except we had a date a couple days ago. And I don't want to seem desperate. Damn I could use a job, that would take up time. Plus I'd have money for... stuff."
At that point the immense mindblowing revelations that had already cycled
through his mind several times earlier caused Lones to stop talking to
himself. His thoughts folded in on him, where he could think much more
clearly, but also much more vaguely. And he sank into that wonderful state
where one does not sleep, but one is not awake. And Lones decided that
a job would most definitely be a good thing, and also that his column
was well-written. His chain of thought then connected this to greco-roman
architecture, and then to thinking about gladiators. Then Lones started
thinking about Russell Crowe, and how it would be cool to be Australian.
Wait, Crowe is Australian isn't he? Or was he? Fuck, what color were Claire's
eyes? Because damn that was a cool dream. Some vague memory of a sunset,
and some kissing. Or was it sunrise?